Sometimes life is not super sparkling,,,, arrhhgg… This month I have been a terrible friend and girlfriend. Gosh!
Sometimes there is just simply not enough time for it all and then I become like an eremite to save energy. I have missed a few social appointments as I forgot to put them in my calendar (I am a slave to my calendar), I have been sitting with the laptop in my lap each night when my partner is watching a movie (super unsocial), I have called my parents but never really been present in the call (just answering like a machine) and just thought everyone should adapt after me. And here I am having a feeling of failing in my relationships but managed pretty well professionally. Good or bad? I think bad.
For example; today I had made an appointment with one of my best friends to meet up after work for a drink. We decided this already two weeks ago and she reminded me this morning. I had missed to note it down in my calendar and hence, I had absolutely no memory about our meet-up. Crap! Then I wish I was flexible enough to say “sure yes I come” which I used to do before I had a partner, but tonight I had made plans at home with my partner; our typical “at home Friday tradition” to open a good bottle of wine, cook some nice food and chat about the past week. (my favourite evening!) and on top of that I need to pack for Munich and just simply get up early. Gosh!
So this is what I did instead of being simply honest with myself; I text my friend and try to squeeze in a drink at 18.00, even if I know she cant really make it out of the office that early (so I stress her) then I plan to run home and buy food and flowers on my way to be home at 7.30 latest. No no no no…full stop, this does not work and I know it. But I want it to work because I want to be the best friend and the best girlfriend in the world.
Right now I feel I had the best intentions, but I completely failed. Now I will go and buy some flowers to make parts of my plan happen. Sometimes things just not work out. Bhu huu. I hope I learn something from this. Enjoy your Friday!! Hugs!